Ideas to Help Codependent Teens & Adolescents
Life in late middle school of early high-school can be very challenging. Codependent teens and adolescents need help and communication. Learn have to have family meetings with teenagers. Listen to their input. Save your battles for ones about safety. Try to keep them in school but if not enroll them in a trade school where they do well.
Spiritual values and beliefs in a child will keep them on a more moral path even when you are not around. This, as everything else, has to start when they are young. Try to stay as consistent as possible with rules but make leniency for holidays, summer days such as vacations.
Allow their friends to be at your house so you know the guests and what comes in. If your teenager wants to do something like piercings or tattoos and you disapprove let them know your feelings and set guidelines. Put an age limit on it and say they will have to earn the money and then you can do it.
Make the age reason within appropriate social norms, not 18 when they are ready to leave your home. If you insist on your own way unless it is to show concern about safely issues you are teaching your child to please you creating codependency. You don’t want to teach your child to let the world make their choices for them, so don’t insist that everything be your way either. If you do you are creating a puppet dependent on you instead of a growing of a unique individual.
Communication with Teens & Adolescents
Bringing up a child in the modern age is difficult. Keep the communication doors open. Let them know you will be there whether they make a mistake or not. If they call you drunk go pick them up and be thankful they did not run away in deception or let somebody drunk drive them home. Then discuss what made them do it. Teenagers are likely to do things to see how it feels. Remind them again they are to obey the law and can decide to drink when they are 21.
Point out the consequences of illegal drugs so they know what lies ahead of them if they are caught, because if they use much chances are they will be. If a problem is too big for you seek outside counseling. Encourage abstinence from sex but teach them safe sex if they choose to practice it. Stay in reality and remember once they are 13 they are going to rebel as part of their becoming an individual.
Children beginning to rebel is why family meetings and standards must be set. Let them know as you did when they were young life has consequences. A strong spiritual belief will keep them stronger than you can. Even if you don’t go to church you can teach them spirituality and of a supportive Heavenly Father. Many churches have programs for teenagers and sober activities you may want to investigate without pushing them to get dressed up for a Sunday morning unless they choose too.
